Thursday, October 29, 2009

LIFE I

The most difficult task in life is to understand someone’s behavior. At times there are so many facets attached to a person’s personality that even if you spend a life time with them you’ll still be left with eons to discover am just a little confused with the ways events take place in our lives. At times things just happen out of the blue the other times things just won’t work out no matter how many chances you take. Seems that even god has scheduled things with a certain target. The way he deals with a million situations when we have no way out and the way he puts us into them. Don’t know where I can find an answer to all such questions. No spiritual guru can answer my strange questions of course. They are so contradictory…. The moment I’m near to finding an answer to my questions the same unforeseen events take place changing my complete perceptions and in the end am left with absolutely nothing. There is no one I know I can look up to.
There are moments when you feel that you come in terms with life and the other moment you are so near to death that the meaning of the word life changes.
All my life I took life for granted and I still do! Every night I go off to sleep I assume that I have to wake up d next morning. So it’s a have to have to kind of a thing. As if living a life means doing a favor to god; but lately things changed again bringing me so near to death one day that the next day meant living a new life all over again. It feels good to live when otherwise I see people dying every other day. There are times when I really get scared, of death, of losing my loved ones, and I cry. I can’t stop the moments or change the course of life and I feel so helpless. Yet I find solace in that one sentence that my parents instilled in my mind that everything happens for good and that everything has a meaning. I only start finding new meanings and I come up with so many.
Bleeding heart drinks tears of pain, cries every moment lives life in vain. Keeps looking for a moment of solitude where it could escape the ravages of this world. No friend by its side no soul it wants to call its own.
I’ve almost given up, don’t want to seek any more answers and I don’t thing if anyone will be able to explain it all to me so I leave them here…. Why do people leave or why do we want them to stay with us forever. Why won’t we stop expecting things out of life and when will we stop cursing god for all the wrongs that happen to us. Things that perturb me so much may not be important to a million. I’m a futile thinker and would still keep thinking come what may, will still come up with many arbitrary time spending questions of which I wont have an answer nor will any one else.

2 comments:

P said...

There are some questions which can never be answered :) And yes, everything does happen for a good reason! Take my word! :)

aquaazure said...

hmmmm... now i know sweethrt... n btw ur blog is like awesome!!